Launch Pad Contents
Do You Know What You Know?
The concept of “you know what you know, you know what you don’t know, and you don’t know what you don’t know” offers a powerful framework for understanding awareness and growth—not just intellectually but also mentally and emotionally. By recognising knowledge gaps and blind spots, we unlock the potential to build resilience, improve emotional intelligence, and enhance mental fitness. This idea is particularly relevant to personal development, emotional well-being, and adaptive problem-solving. A coach serves as an essential partner in addressing these levels, helping to expand not only intellectual but also emotional and psychological awareness.
The Three Levels of Awareness
You Know What You Know
This represents the knowledge, skills, and mental strategies you’re confident about.
Example: An accountant knows how to complete financial records.
Mental and Emotional Fitness at This Level:
Confidence in your ability to manage emotions, such as staying calm under pressure.
Proficiency in mental techniques like mindfulness or goal-setting.
Awareness of emotional triggers and the ability to respond constructively.
A coach challenges you to deepen and leverage your emotional and mental fitness. They help you refine these strengths, ensuring you maximise your capacity for balance, focus, and well-being.
You Know What You Don’t Know
This reflects awareness of areas where mental and emotional skills and knowledge need development.
Example: You recognise that you struggle with assertive communication and want to improve your boundary-setting skills.
Mental and Emotional Fitness at This Level:
Recognising gaps in emotional skills, such as difficulty managing anger or anxiety.
Awareness of mental habits that hinder growth, like procrastination or negative self-talk.
Desire to learn strategies to handle emotional challenges more effectively.
A coach helps you identify and practice the techniques needed to enhance emotional resilience and mental agility. They guide you in acquiring tools like stress management techniques, conflict resolution strategies, and self-regulation practices.
You Don’t Know What You Don’t Know
These are the hidden emotional and cognitive blind spots – areas where you’re unaware of your own limitations and vulnerabilities.
Example: A team captain may not realise their leadership style is alienating team members.
Mental and Emotional Fitness at This Level:
Unawareness of deep-seated beliefs or habits affecting emotional well-being, like perfectionism or fear of failure.
Blind spots in emotional intelligence, such as empathy gaps or misinterpreting social cues.
Opportunities for profound growth once these areas are uncovered and addressed.
A coach helps illuminate these blind spots through thoughtful inquiry, observation, and feedback. By fostering a safe and reflective environment, they enable you to uncover and address hidden emotional challenges or mental roadblocks.
How a Coach Helps Across These Levels
A coach uses reflective questions to help you explore your thoughts, emotions, behaviours, and patterns. This deepens your understanding of mental and emotional habits, uncovering unconscious influences.
Example: Coach: “How do you usually respond when you feel overwhelmed?” Client: “I tend to withdraw, but I hadn’t realised it’s impacting my relationships.”
A coach provides new frameworks to help you approach emotional and mental challenges with greater flexibility and insight.
Example: Coach: “What if you viewed emotional setbacks as opportunities to build resilience rather than as failures?” Client: “Resilience? That’s a shift. It makes me think about setbacks as growth moments.”
A coach provides new frameworks to help you approach emotional and mental challenges with greater flexibility and insight.
Example: Coach: “What if you viewed emotional setbacks as opportunities to build resilience rather than as failures?” Client: “Resilience? That’s a shift. It makes me think about setbacks as growth moments.”
A coach examines your mental and emotional habits, helping you identify limiting beliefs and reframe them.
Example: Client: “I’ve always avoided confrontation because it’s too stressful.” Coach: “What might you gain by approaching conflicts as opportunities to build stronger connections?”
A coach equips you with mental and emotional strategies tailored to your needs.
Example: Client: “I often feel anxious before big meetings.” Coach: “Let’s explore grounding techniques like breathing and visualisation. How might practicing these help you feel more centred?”
Through structured plans and ongoing dialogue, a coach supports you in taking deliberate steps toward mental and emotional fitness.
Example: Coach: “In our last session, we discussed using mindfulness to manage stress. How has that been going?” Client: “It’s been helpful, but I still find myself rushing through it.” Coach: “Let’s set a goal to dedicate at least 10 uninterrupted minutes daily and reflect on how it impacts your focus.”
Increased Emotional Clarity: Gain a deeper understanding of your mental and emotional strengths, challenges, and growth opportunities.
Proactive Mental Fitness: Address emotional vulnerabilities before they escalate into significant stressors.
Enhanced Resilience: Build tools and strategies to navigate life’s challenges with confidence and composure.
Continuous Emotional Growth: Foster adaptability, self-compassion, and emotional intelligence through feedback and self-reflection.
By working with a coach, you can navigate the journey from self-awareness to self-mastery, unlocking the full potential of your mental and emotional fitness.
Reflective Questions
When do I feel the most mentally and emotionally balanced, and how can I actively nurture this state?
What specific areas of my mental and emotional fitness require attention, and what steps am I taking to improve them?
When was the last time I uncovered an emotional or cognitive blind spot? How can I create opportunities to identify and address similar challenges in the future?
Where is Your Focus?
The concept of “you get what you focus on” suggests that your thoughts, attention, and energy significantly influence your outcomes. What you consistently focus on – whether consciously or unconsciously – tends to shape your reality, behaviours, and results. This principle draws from psychology, neuroscience, and personal development, emphasising the power of intentional focus in achieving successful outcomes as well as mental and emotional fitness.
Focus Directs Attention:
The human brain has a limited capacity for processing information. When you focus on something specific, your brain prioritises it, often filtering out other possibilities and distractions.
Example: If you focus on emotional resilience, you’re more likely to notice strategies and resources that enhance your well-being. Conversely, focusing on stress may amplify feelings of overwhelm.
Focus Shapes Behaviour:
Your attention drives your actions. Focusing on productive and emotionally enriching outcomes often leads to intentional efforts, while focusing on fears and failures may lead to procrastination and avoidance.
Example: An athlete focusing on winning a race, channels their energy into disciplined training, while one focusing on failure might cause hesitation and self-sabotage.
Focus Amplifies Results:
Sustained focus creates momentum. Whether you’re building emotional strength or mastering a new skill, consistent attention compounds over time, producing tangible outcomes.
Example: Professionals focusing on work-life balance are better positioned to cultivate both personal satisfaction and career success.
The Role of a Coach in This Concept
A coach can help you harness the power of focus effectively, ensuring it aligns with your personal development and your mental and emotional fitness. Here’s how:
A coach helps you define clear, meaningful objectives so your focus aligns with what truly matters.
Example Question: “What areas of your life need the most emotional support and attention in the next 6 months?”
A coach helps you identify where your focus currently lies (e.g., on negative emotions, distractions, and unproductive habits) and guide you in shifting toward more empowering areas.
Example Exercise: A coach may ask you to journal your thoughts and emotional triggers over a week to identify patterns.
Negative focus often stems from limiting beliefs and fears. A coach helps reframe these beliefs, enabling you to focus on possibilities, emotional growth, and strengths.
Example:
Client: “I feel stuck thinking about my past mistakes.”
Coach: “What lessons did those mistakes teach you, and how can they guide your future?”
A coach helps maintain your focus by setting priorities, tracking progress, and holding you accountable for your commitments.
Example: A coach might ask, “What will you commit to focusing on this week, and how will we measure your progress?”
Through mindfulness exercises, visualisation techniques, and structured planning, a coach helps train your mind to focus effectively and consistently.
Example Tool: Creating a “focus board” with visual reminders of your key goals.
It’s natural to lose focus or encounter setbacks. A coach helps you realign your focus after distractions and failures, ensuring long-term consistency and emotional strength.
Example: After a stressful week, a coach might ask, “What coping strategies worked well, and how can you integrate them moving forward?”
Increased Clarity: Understand what truly deserves your focus.
Improved Productivity: Channel your energy into high-impact areas that foster both success and well-being.
Reduced Distractions: Learn to filter out noise and stay aligned with your intentions.
Stronger Resilience: Bounce back faster when focus wains and emotions fluctuate.
Enhanced Outcomes: Achieve results that align with your values, well-being and values.
By guiding you to keep focus intentionally and consistently on the right things, a coach empowers you to move past obstacles, unlock your potential, and create meaningful, balanced success.
Reflective Questions
What’s one area of my life where I’ve seen results improve because I intentionally focused on it?
Do I spend more time focusing on problems or on solutions?
What distractions or negative focuses are holding me back?
How can I better align my thoughts and focus with the outcomes I want in life?
The Power of Language
Consider this, how often do you hear people reply to the question of how are you, with “not bad”? Equally, you may hear people say “I forgot where I put my keys?” Would it make a difference if you answered “I’m doing great, thank you”, or thought “what if I could remember where I put my keys?” In both examples we are influencing our unconscious mind through the power of our language. We can use more positive, empowering language to achieve more happiness and success in life, it’s psychology 101.
Conscious Attention to Language:
Giving language conscious attention is understood through the concept of Neuro-Linguistic Programming, or NLP. NLP is a psychological framework that explores the connection between neurological processes (how we think), language (how we communicate), and behaviour (how we act). It focuses on how language patterns, thought processes, and behaviours can be intentionally adjusted to achieve specific goals, improve communication, and enhance personal effectiveness.
The Key Principles of Conscious Attention to language are:
People’s perceptions of reality are subjective and shaped by their internal “maps” of the world. Conscious attention to language aims to refine these maps for clarity and empowerment.
Imagine two people walking into the same meeting. One thinks, “This is going to be a disaster—no one respects my ideas.” The other thinks, “This is a chance to share my thoughts and learn from others.” They’re in the same room, but their “mental maps” of the situation couldn’t be more different. By consciously choosing more empowering language, like reframing the first thought to “I have valuable ideas, and I’m excited to share them,” the first person can shift their mindset and have a completely different experience.
Using specific cues (words, gestures, or imagery) to elicit a desired emotional or behavioural state.
Think about how a favourite song can instantly make you feel happy or nostalgic. That’s anchoring at work. Now, imagine you’re about to give a presentation, and you’re feeling nervous. You can create a positive anchor by pairing a confident phrase, like “I’ve got this,” with a small gesture, like squeezing your thumb and index finger together. Over time, this association helps you summon confidence on demand just by doing the gesture.
Changing the meaning of an experience to create a more empowering perspective.
Let’s say you didn’t get the promotion you were hoping for. Your initial thought might be, “I failed, and I’m not good enough.” Reframing this could look like saying, “This is a chance to develop new skills and prepare for the next opportunity.” The event hasn’t changed, but your perspective has—and that changes everything.
Identifying and replicating the thought patterns and behaviours of successful individuals.
Picture someone who’s exceptional at time management. They always seem calm, meet deadlines, and juggle responsibilities effortlessly. Instead of reinventing the wheel, you can model their success. Start by observing their habits: Do they use a specific planner? Block out their calendar? Prioritise tasks in a certain way? Then, replicate their strategies in your own way.
Semantics is the study of meaning in language—how words, phrases, and sentences communicate ideas. The language we use reflects and reinforces our beliefs, emotions, and behaviours. In the context of coaching, semantics becomes a powerful tool for shaping how individuals perceive their reality.
Words and phrases that reinforce limitation, fear, or self-doubt.
Example: “I’ll never get this right,” “This is impossible for me.”
Words and phrases that promote confidence, possibility, and positive outcomes.
Example: “I can figure this out,” “This is a challenge I’m ready to tackle.”
The Impact of Empowering vs. Disempowering Language:
Language doesn’t just describe reality—it shapes it. The words we use influence our mindset, emotional state, and behaviour:
Disempowering Language:
- Creates a sense of helplessness or defeat.
- Reinforces limiting beliefs.
- Diminishes motivation and resilience.
Empowering Language:
- Encourages confidence and proactive behaviour.
- Fosters a growth mindset.
- Opens pathways for problem-solving and creativity.
How a Coach Can Help with NLP, Semantics, and Language:
Coaches help clients recognise the words and phrases they frequently use and how these influence their thoughts and behaviours.
Example Question: “What do you notice about the way you describe this situation? How does it make you feel?”
Coaches use reframing techniques from NLP to help clients reinterpret challenges in a more empowering light.
Example:
Disempowering: “I failed at this.”
Reframed: “This attempt didn’t work, but I learned something valuable for next time.”
Changing the meaning of an experience to create a more empowering perspective.
Coaches encourage clients to replace disempowering phrases with language that fosters growth and optimism.
Example Tool: A “language journal” to track and rewrite limiting self-talk into empowering affirmations.
Using NLP anchoring techniques, coaches help clients associate empowering words or phrases with a positive emotional state, creating a resource they can draw on when needed.
Example: Visualising success while repeating a phrase like, “I am capable and resourceful.”
Coaches challenge disempowering assumptions embedded in language to open up new perspectives.
Example Question: “What if you could succeed at this? What would you do differently?”
Powerful questions direct attention toward solutions, possibilities, and strengths.
Example: Instead of asking, “Why is this so hard?” a coach might ask, “What’s one small step you could take to make this easier?”
Coaches help clients cultivate a habit of using forward-looking, solution-focused language that aligns with their goals and values.
Example Activity: Writing daily affirmations or intentions.
Reflective Questions
How might my relationships, career, and overall happiness improve if I became more mindful of my language?
How often do I respond to “How are you?” with neutral or negative phrases like “not bad” or “could be worse”?
How would my mood and mindset change if I responded with something positive, like “I’m great, thank you” or “Awesome!”?
How could I reframe words to be more positive and solution-focused? Eg, replacing “I forgot” with “What if I could remember?”
Discover Your Why
Simon Sinek’s Start with Why theory is a leadership and communication framework that emphasises the importance of understanding and communicating the purpose behind actions, products, and teams. It is based on the premise that people, including yourself, are inspired and motivated not by what you do or how you do it, but by why you do it. This idea is captured in his concept of the Golden Circle and explained in his book Start with Why and his famous TED Talk, How Great Leaders Inspire Action.
The Golden Circle
The Golden Circle is a visual framework consisting of three concentric circles:
Represents the purpose, cause, or belief behind what you do.
It answers: Why do you exist? Why do you do what you do?
This is the core of the message and is emotionally resonant.
Represents the processes, values, or methods you use to achieve your goals.
It answers: How do you do what you do differently or better than others?
Represents the tangible products, services, or actions you deliver.
It answers: What do you do?
Key Principles of the "Start with Why" Theory
Leadership and influence come from inspiring others rather than manipulating them with incentives, fear, or pressure.
People are more likely to connect with the purpose (why) than the product (what). This emotional connection drives loyalty and advocacy.
People who clearly articulate their why can inspire others to share their vision and align their actions toward a common goal.
When a person aligns why with the audience’s values, it fosters trust and long-term loyalty.
Simon Sinek uses the following example of how a company promotes their why first and appeals to emotions of their customers, making their products more than just tools—they become symbols of a shared belief system.
Why: Apple believes in challenging the status quo and thinking differently.
How: They design products with simplicity, innovation, and user-friendliness.
What: They create computers, smartphones, and software.
Sinek’s theory underscores that leading with purpose not only inspires others but also fosters authentic and meaningful connections. Whether applied in sports, personal development, or leadership, Start with Why offers a powerful lens for building trust, engagement, and sustainable success.
Start With Why TED Talk
Click on the video below to watch the TED talk. Remember this was recorded around 2009 and at some stage the 2nd most viewed TED talk. It has had over 12 million views.
Reflective Questions
If someone asked you, what do you do, how would you answer?
What am I passionate about and why do I do it?
How do I do it?
What do I do?
How confident am I that this coaching program will help me achieve success and happiness?
Develop Habits to Empower
Creating empowering and positive habits is essential to your success because they shape the foundation of our daily lives and long-term success. Habits determine how we approach challenges, manage time, and prioritise well-being. When these habits are intentionally positive, they boost confidence, productivity, and overall happiness.
Positive habits free up mental energy by automating healthy behaviours, making it easier to stay consistent. They also create momentum—small, repeated actions compound into significant achievements over time.
Start by identifying a small, meaningful action aligned with what you want to achieve. Focus on consistency rather than perfection. For example, if you want to reduce stress, commit to a simple 5-minute mindfulness practice each morning. Over time, this habit can grow into a more robust routine.
Habits are the building blocks of a fulfilling and successful life. They influence how we spend our time, approach challenges, and move closer to our goals. By forming specific, intentional habits, we can create positive routines that support our growth and well-being.
Let’s look at weight loss as an example and how you might develop particular habits.
Losing weight is not about quick fixes but about creating sustainable habits that promote health and well-being. To achieve this, focus on small, actionable steps that align with your goals. Here’s a detailed example of how to form habits for weight loss:
Focus on Positive Actions
When forming habits, use positive language to empower yourself. For instance, instead of saying, “I will not drink soft drinks,” reframe it as, “I will drink water with every meal.” Positive language creates a sense of opportunity and empowerment rather than deprivation, which can help you stick to the habit.
Example Habit:
Positive: “I will prepare balanced meals with vegetables, lean protein, and healthy fats.”
Negative: “I will not eat junk food.”
The positive statement encourages a proactive approach to what you will do, while the negative focuses on restriction, which can feel discouraging or lead to cravings.
Use Lead Measures Instead of Lag Measures
Lag measures, like the number on the scale, reflect the outcome of your efforts but don’t guide daily actions. Lead measures are actionable and directly influence the result.
Drink 2 litres of water daily.
Walk 10,000 steps a day.
Prepare meals at home 5 days a week.
Eat 5 servings of fruits and vegetables daily.
By focusing on lead measures, you can measure your progress based on actions within your control rather than waiting for lag measures like weight loss to catch up.
Morning Habit: Drink a glass of water upon waking.
Mealtime Habit: Serve half your plate with vegetables.
Exercise Habit: Walk for 30 minutes after dinner.
Snack Habit: Replace processed snacks with whole fruits or nuts.
Evening Habit: Reflect on your day and plan meals for tomorrow
Why This Works
Positive Language Boosts Motivation: It frames actions as opportunities, making them more appealing and reinforcing a sense of accomplishment.
Lead Measures Build Momentum: They ensure you focus on controllable actions that drive success, keeping you motivated even before you see visible results.
By building habits rooted in positive action and lead measures, you create a pathway for consistent progress while fostering a positive mindset and healthier lifestyle.
Reflective Questions
Which bad habits do I need to stop?
What did I gain from those bad habits?
How can I avoid them in the future?
What habit can I replace them with?
What steps can I take to form my new habit?
The Learning Process
Developing Mental and Emotional Fitness: Learn, Practice, and Teach
Building mental and emotional fitness follows the same three-step process as any other skill: learning, practicing, and sharing. This approach ensures not only personal growth but also the ability to inspire and support others on their journey.
The first step is to educate yourself on the principles of mental and emotional fitness. This may include understanding how your thoughts, emotions, and behaviours interact, as well as discovering tools to manage them effectively. Often, this process requires unlearning counterproductive habits and thought patterns.
Example: If you’ve always suppressed emotions instead of processing them, you may need to unlearn avoidance strategies. This might involve reading about emotional intelligence, attending workshops on mindfulness, and working with a coach to identify healthier ways to respond to challenges
Practice is critical to strengthening mental and emotional fitness. By consistently applying the tools you’ve learned, you train your mind and emotions to respond constructively in real-life situations.
Example: After learning grounding techniques like deep breathing and journaling, you practice them daily, especially during moments of stress. Over time, these techniques become second nature, enabling you to stay calm and focused even in high-pressure situations.
Sharing what you’ve learned about mental and emotional fitness not only helps others, it also reinforces your understanding. By teaching and discussing strategies with friends, family, and colleagues, you deepen your skills and create a supportive environment.
Example: If you’ve mastered techniques to reduce anxiety, like reframing negative thoughts, you can share these tools with a stressed friend or coworker. Teaching them not only solidifies your own practice but also creates a ripple effect, empowering others to manage their mental well-being.
The Importance of Learning Something New
Developing mental and emotional fitness often requires stepping outside your comfort zone and challenging long-held beliefs and behaviours. Embracing new strategies while letting go of unhelpful ones is essential for growth.
Example: If you tend to react defensively to criticism, you might unlearn this habit by practicing active listening and seeking constructive feedback. This shift enhances your emotional agility and strengthens your relationships.
Benefits of the Learning Process in Mental and Emotional Fitness
Increased Resilience: Learning and practicing coping strategies prepare you to navigate life’s challenges with greater ease.
Enhanced Emotional Regulation: Applying what you’ve learned helps you respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively.
Stronger Connections: Sharing your journey inspires and empowers others, creating a culture of mutual growth and support.
By committing to learning, practicing, and sharing, you build a foundation of mental and emotional fitness that not only improves your well-being but also positively impacts the people around you. This process fosters resilience, empathy, and a deeper connection to yourself and others.
Reflective Questions
Why is developing my mental and emotional fitness important to me?
What have I learned so far in this program?
How can I practice this new learning?
Who can I share my new learnings with?
Coaching from a Strengths Perspective
Why Coaching?
You do not need to ‘change’, you simply need to be better at being you.
Strength Based Coaching is based on the premise that it’s better to draw out what is natural in you, rather than try to ‘top up’ what might be missing. You are unique and valuing that uniqueness is important. It allows you to be intentional when applying your natural talents. Intentionally applying these ideals provides the deep practice that assist in developing your mature Strengths.
Innate Talent + Skills + Knowledge = Strength
We define an innate talent as your natural patterns of thought, emotion and behaviour. Basically, how you think and feel reflects on how you act. Therefore, when we develop our mental and emotional fitness we greatly increase the chances of success. Remember, there are over 33 million combinations of these talent patterns, so you definitely unique.
Points to Remember
Ask yourself, what am I already doing well and how can I replicate that.
Develop what is going well. Focusing on what you can do is more productive than struggling against what you can’t.
Focusing on Strength does not mean forgetting weakness. Instead it means acknowledging your weaknesses and then managing them in a resourceful way.
Note: A weakness is something that gets in the way of your (or someone else’s) success.
If something is not working, consider how it ‘could’ work. Look at your innate talents, choose the outcome you want and then consider how you can apply what you do well to achieve that outcome. Sometimes this may mean partnering with someone else, other times it may mean applying your talents in a novel way. The key is to be intentionally focused on the outcome.
Remember, every talent theme has an ability, a liability, a power and a vulnerability. When we are in flow, we’re in the penthouse, but when fear, hurt or pride is involved, we may find ourselves in the outhouse.
When working with others, if we want what they ‘bring’, we need to provide what they need.
Mapping Your Success from Raw Talent to Mature Strength
We’re born with raw talent. As we consciously apply knowledge and skills, our raw talents become mature strengths. We develop in character and ability. It is your choice how you plan to use your talents.
Some people choose to do nothing. Their talents remain buried, locked beneath ego, blame and shame.
However, you can choose a different path. You can choose to use your talents key to unlock your Strengths. Add a mindful compass and you have a technique to navigate life’s challenges.
Combining your innate talents with mindful awareness of thoughts and emotions, and an intentional awareness of the language you use, are tools for increasing well-being. You build an understanding of your conscious and unconscious mind that nurtures connection.
Are you ready to strengthen your own mind? Will you be the person who understands your own thoughts, emotions and behaviours?
The Next Step...
If you haven’t already done so, is complete the Clifton StrengthsFinder online assessment. If you are completing this program with a coach, you should have been given an access code. If you haven’t received one, please contact your coach before moving onto the next section.
If you are attempting this program alone, we recommend you completing this assessment.
There is an additional fee, however this is charged by Gallup, an external company not affiliated with CYC. You can continue on without completing it, however without knowing your talent patterns it may challenge your understanding of some of the content.
You will need around 30 mins of uninterrupted time to complete the survey, there are no right or wrong answers. You may want to use a laptop or PC as it is easier to read than on a mobile. Ensure you have a secure internet connection.
The questions are designed to interpret your natural patterns of thought, emotion and behaviour and you will receive your results upon completion. Initially they will ask for personal details, and as it is mainly designed for employees, will ask for company details. You may leave this blank.
The questions use a likert scale, with a range of options ranging from strongly agree to strongly disagree. It is best to go with your initial instinct. You may find some questions challenging, or they don’t relate to you. Simply use the neutral option.
Each question allows around 20 seconds to answer. Remember, if you are unsure how to answer, or you agree or disagree with both ranges and time runs out – that is still an answer. Trust that many people miss a couple of questions and that is okay.
Once complete, you will receive your results. There is a wealth of information you may access. If you have time read through what you wish. You will need to download your Insight Guide and the Action Plan for future use.
Click below to access the Gallup website.
Congratulations
You have now completed the Launch Pad section and ready to move on to the first official coaching session. If you are following this journey with a coach be sure to have booked in your initial coaching session.
And for those of you going it alone, remember you will reap more rewards with a workbook to complete the upcoming activities and exercises. Simply contact us today to purchase your copy.
Apart from that, best wishes on your journey. Some people have told us that the next section is by far their favourite. Simply click Next to continue.
And remember, now is the time to complete the Weekly Wellbeing Check.